Hens??

I just had to take a moment to share with you all the status of our chickens.
As you know, due to my long and lengthy complaining, Gary and I have had chickens since last summer. We did this in order to try to live a more green, sustainable lifestyle. And, it was supposed to save us money in the long run: eggs, fertilizer, eating scraps, etc... And as of today, December 1st, we have had no eggs.
In order for us to live this more green, sustainable lifestyle, we had an initial outlay of funds for the backyard chicken coop, chickens, feed, and other assorted items that we never thought about... buckets to hold the feed, feeders, waterers, cloth to cover the chicken coop to provide shade, yadda, yadda, yadda.
So as time passes, I notice that the chickens aren't laying eggs. All they are doing is eating and pooping. They eat a lot and poop a lot. I mention this to Gary. He (who is a scientist) says that this is due to the young age of the chickens. He assures me that we will have eggs by October.
October comes and goes... no eggs.
I mention this again to Gary. And He (who is a scientist and expert Googler) says that now it is due to the lack of daylight. There is something behinds the chicken's eye that is stimulated by sunlight, causing the chicken to lay eggs. I think that it has nothing to do with sunlight - but more to do with roosters parading around as hens. (And of course I tell Gary this - and he thinks that I'm silly).
Last week, Gary bought a flood light and timer. "Now the chickens will lay eggs", he says. So he installs the flood light on their chicken coop and attaches a timer, runs an extension cord across our back yard, down the hillside, and plugs it into the outside outlet.
A couple of mornings ago, I was dozing and heard a rooster crowing. I figured it was quite a ways away from us because it was faint. And it didn't sound like a rooster... more like, "wrack-a wrack-a wrack"! I mentioned it to Gary later in the day. He said that he didn't hear a thing.
So this morning, I was dozing and heard the same thing -- wrack-a wrack-a wrack! It still sounded far off and muffled. I nudged Gary awake so he could hear it too. I wondered which neighbor had snuck in a rooster and was glad that it was so far away. But Gary jumped out of bed, threw on his robe and ran outside to check on the girls!
A few minutes later, he thumped back inside. I asked after the chickens -- and he said that they were fine. And then after a little muttering and stomping around, he tells me that Snowball, our white chicken, looked at him square in the eye and said "wrack-a wrack-a WRACK".

Humph, so much for eggs.